Search found 133 matches

by nikita
Fri Jul 07, 2006 9:23 pm
Forum: Learning English
Topic: Funny Students' Mistakes
Replies: 13
Views: 99521

Eat Chopsticks

Hello,

Here is a new one for you.

I can eat chopsticks. Can you?
(Instead of “I can eat with chopsticks. Can you?”)

Have a nice day.

Nikita
by nikita
Tue Jul 04, 2006 3:49 pm
Forum: English Grammar
Topic: Open and closed syllables
Replies: 1
Views: 267861

The Rule of the Open and Closed Stressed Syllable

Hello, Valera Here is the Rule of the Open vs. Closed Stressed Syllable for you. The Open Syllable is the one that ends in a vowel. This syllable, according to the rule, must be read as in the English alphabet. (But please remember that there are loads exceptions to this rule!) a /ei/ Examples: Cake...
by nikita
Sun Jul 02, 2006 11:30 am
Forum: English Garage
Topic: Timbuktu Joke
Replies: 0
Views: 87808

Timbuktu Joke

Hello, This is one of the best jokes I have ever read! Have fun! Timbuktu Joke The finals of the National Poetry Contest last year came down to two finalists. One was a University of Alabama Law School graduate from an upper crust family; well-bred, well-connected, and all that goes with it. The oth...
by nikita
Sun Jul 02, 2006 11:16 am
Forum: English Garage
Topic: Humor in uniform
Replies: 3
Views: 24522

Army Recruiting Office

Hello, Here are two stories about army recruiting offices. Publicity Recruiting posters in England promise: "Join the Army. No Time Wasted on Going To Your Job Place and Back." And even a better one. Less Dangerous A poster was displayed in a busy street in London: "Join Paratroops! It's Less Danger...
by nikita
Sun Jul 02, 2006 11:06 am
Forum: English Garage
Topic: Lost in Translation
Replies: 3
Views: 29996

Lost in Translation

Hello, It is time for another Lost in Translation story. One Word Reply When an American force was surrounded by the Nazis in a town during the Ardennes counteroffensive later in 1944 they received an ultimatum with a demand to surrender. The Nazis received a short reply which made German interprete...
by nikita
Sat Jul 01, 2006 5:58 pm
Forum: English Garage
Topic: Lost in Translation
Replies: 3
Views: 29996

Lost in Translation

Hello, there The other day I came across the following story about a translation blunder. I hope you'll like it too. Disadvantage of Knowing a Foreign Language During World War II Admiral Canaris, then head of the Nazi intelligence service, received a report from his Spanish agents on a conference o...
by nikita
Sat Jul 01, 2006 5:55 pm
Forum: English Garage
Topic: Three kinds of limericks
Replies: 1
Views: 16961

A limerick from Edward Lear’s Book of Nonsense

Hello,

It is time for another limerick written by Edward Lear.

There was an Old Lady of Chertsey,
Who made a remarkable curtsey;
She twirled round and round
Till she sank underground,
Which distressed all the people of Chertsey.


Have a nice day!

Nikita
by nikita
Sat Jul 01, 2006 5:53 pm
Forum: English Garage
Topic: Humor in uniform
Replies: 3
Views: 24522

Infallible General

Hello, Here is another army joke for you. A general who believed he was a great strategist startled his staff officers by admitting that once he had been wrong in his decision. "You wrong, sir?" exclaimed on of his listeners. "Yes," replied the infallible general. "Once I thought I was wrong when I ...
by nikita
Sat Jul 01, 2006 5:50 pm
Forum: English Grammar
Topic: On Saturday morning or On Saturday mornings???
Replies: 3
Views: 55492

Jonathan's explanation

Hello, there I have finally managed to speak to Jonathan. According to him, it is better to say "on Saturday mornings" when you are talking about a regularly repeated activity. For example: I play ping-pong on Saturday mornings. But if you are talking about one-time event, obviously you cannot put "...
by nikita
Sat Jul 01, 2006 5:43 pm
Forum: Beginner's corner
Topic: don't kiss me
Replies: 12
Views: 59402

God's retort

Hello, And yet one more joke. A man is talking to God. The man: "God, how long is a million years?" God: "To me, it's about a minute." The man: "God, how much is a million dollars?" God: "To me it's a penny." The man: "God, may I have a penny?" God: "Wait a minute." Cheerio! Nikita
by nikita
Sat Jul 01, 2006 5:39 pm
Forum: Beginner's corner
Topic: don't kiss me
Replies: 12
Views: 59402

Four animals for a woman

Hello, there

I am glad you liked them. Here is a new one.

What four animals does a woman need in her life?

- a mink on her back
- a jaguar in the garage
- a tiger in her bed
- and a jackass to pay for it all !!!

Have a nice day! :)

Nikita
by nikita
Thu Jun 29, 2006 10:30 pm
Forum: English Grammar
Topic: Defining and non-defining clauses...
Replies: 3
Views: 30856

Re: Defining and Non-Defining Classes

Hello again What you also need to remember is that non-defining clauses are separated by commas, while defining clauses are not. And here is another very good example from Headway. I had a cocktail that was very unusual. I had a cocktail which was very unusual. These two sentences have absolutely id...
by nikita
Tue Jun 27, 2006 6:31 pm
Forum: English Grammar
Topic: Defining and non-defining clauses...
Replies: 3
Views: 30856

Defining and Non-Defining Classes

Hello, In simple words about the defining and non-defining classes. If you remove a non-defining clause (a kind of a smaller sentence that is a part of a bigger sentence), some information will be definitely lost, but it will still remain a normal and meaningful English sentence. This is because the...
by nikita
Tue Jun 27, 2006 8:25 am
Forum: English Garage
Topic: Humor in uniform
Replies: 3
Views: 24522

The last thing he'd do

Hello, And here is a new one for you. After a terrible explosion at an ammunition plant an investigation was initiated. "What cause that explosion?" asked the investigator. "One of the men of this powder mill struck a match." "Struck a match!" exclaimed the amazed investigator. "I'd think that would...
by nikita
Mon Jun 26, 2006 9:27 pm
Forum: English Garage
Topic: Three kinds of limericks
Replies: 1
Views: 16961

Three kinds of limericks

Hello, It is said that there are three kinds of limericks: - the limericks that you can recite in the presence of women and clergy. - the limericks that you can recite in the presence of clergy but not women. - and real limericks. Well, here is a limerick for you that you can recite in the presence ...

Go to advanced search